Associated Baptist Press - Opinion: Why 20- and 30-year-olds are leaving the Baptist church

Opinion: Why 20- and 30-year-olds are leaving the Baptist church

By Carra Hughes Greer

Tuesday, February 09, 2010

Carra Hughes Greer

(ABP) -- Many 20- and 30-year-olds share a distaste toward Baptist churches. As a young minister, I believe my peers need the community and nurturing of a church. I hope the church will hear the cries of these young Christ-followers and see the value, the vision and the deep compassion they possess.

Young adults decide not to attend church for a number of reasons, but there is a particular trend among 20- and 30-year-olds that pertains to local Baptist churches.

The split of the Southern Baptist Convention caused many young Christ-followers to be very disillusioned with the church at an early age, but that isn't solely to blame. There are more compelling reasons keeping 20- and 30-year-olds at an arm's distance from the church.

There are two types of Baptist churches which young Christ-followers are familiar with -- and disinterested in -- the "harsh church" and the "watered-down church."

The harsh church isolates itself from other denominations. Its voice is brash, critical and cold to the changing culture. This church has leaders who speak with loud voices, not just in decibels, but to the media and government in protest against issues regarding school curriculum, the health-care system, marriage or churches with female pastors.

Young Christ-followers hesitate to be associated with a group of Baptists labeled as "crazy" by society for making outrageous statements such as declaring that the cause of Haiti's earthquake was the result of a pact they made with the devil or that the Sept. 11 attacks were brought on by feminists, abortionists and homosexuals. Why would anyone want to join a community of "believers" that seems hateful and compassionless?

In contrast, the watered-down church is unappealing because of its prophetic muteness. More concerned with institutional preservation, this church avoids stepping on theological or ideological toes.

Young Christ-followers want to hear the church discuss and dialogue about homosexuality, social justice issues, women in ministry, poverty, environmental concerns, human rights issues, health-care issues, the AIDS epidemic in Africa, orphans in China, monks in Burma, etc. They are eager to have open, honest, almost jaw-dropping, conversations balancing current issues with their faith.

Instead of church politics, they want churches to become missional. They understand the institutional church but desire the simplicity of the early church. They grow weary of time and money spent maintaining the large church grounds, renovating empty Sunday school rooms, installing the latest technology and managing growing numbers of committees. When the church becomes too distracted to be a church on mission, young Christ-followers focus on serving through a para-church or nonprofit organization that is directly meeting the needs of others.

So, what can our churches do to reach out to young Christ-followers?

First, churches have to be willing to open their doors to a new generation of Christ-followers and understand they do things differently. This new generation thinks, communicates, tithes and serves differently. It is guarded when it comes to trusting authority, so it is crucial that leadership within the church be transparent with them. This group is searching for authentic faith, authentic leadership and authentic ministry.

Churches must also practice what we preach. If we tell these 20- and 30-year-olds we are open to dialogue about social issues, the environment, etc., then we must actually talk about these issues in our Sunday school classes, Bible studies and sermons. Watering down the gospel or avoiding issues altogether only causes bigger rifts in the relationship between the church and young Christ-followers.

Third, our churches must begin to reflect our changing communities. The ministerial staff must diversify to include people of all ages, races and genders as leaders. With a diverse staff, the church will begin to experience things through others' eyes and more voices will be represented from the pulpit. Young Christ-followers will feel accepted as part of the congregation if they see faces just like their own doing things like preaching, teaching, leading, reading and serving.

Finally, all preconceived notions of these young Christ-followers must be thrown out. Not all of them expect loud, Christian rock music, want to wear torn jeans and a T-shirt to church, seek a coffee bar in the worship space or the biggest and brightest LCD screens. Many of the stereotypes our churches have concocted of young Christ-followers are false or at least skewed.

There is a lot at stake. For older generations, it can be painful to recognize that the institution they worked so hard to establish, buildings they worked diligently and gave sacrificially to pay for, and familiar traditions are of waning importance to young Christ-followers. Instead, the mission and service of the church ranks as highest priority.

For younger generations, what's at stake is our ability to find ways to relate, engage and work side-by-side with older generations finding common ground on issues of social justice, faith development, worship experiences, etc.

Contrary to what some Baptist churches believe, young Christ-followers are not pagans running from God into the arms of another religion. They simply desire to be heard and understood for who they really are and for their vision of the future of Baptist churches.

-30-

Carra Hughes Greer is minster to families with youth at Smoke Rise Baptist Church in Stone Mountain, Ga.

EDITORIAL DISCLAIMER: As part of our mission to provide credible and compelling information about matters of faith, Associated Baptist Press actively seeks a diversity of viewpoints in its columns, commentaries and other opinion-based content. Opinions expressed in these articles are not intended to represent ABP editorial policy and do not necessarily reflect the views of ABP’s staff, board of directors or supporters.

What's this?

Comments (19) Add Comment

Subscribe to this comment's feed

Young Christians
written by mitchc, February 09, 2010

Rev. Hughes is correct. We need dialogue in the church and dialogue means that people listen as well as talk. As long as I am talking I am not learning anything. As a boy growing up in a small town church, I was encouraged in every way possible to be active. Today many churches are not interested in what the younger generation has to say. The leadership of the Southern Baptist Convention today is all about talking and not about listening. We are part of the body of Christ, but just a small part. Young Christians want to do something that is meaningful in solving the great problems of society.

Real Reason
written by Bobby McCord, February 10, 2010

The real reason alot of young adults are not in church is,they look for a church that will meet their needs when they should be looking for a church where they can serve God and meet the needs of others. When the modern church went into the entertainment business it started a competition between churches and between the church and the world. We have trained people to look for the best entertainment instead of the best place where they can glorify God and reach people for the Kingdom.
When we stop compromising the Commands from the Father, the Convictions from the Spirit, and the Call from Christ, we will reach young adults again. They are not looking for the world, they have the world. They are looking for the Truth. We do not compromise for people. We lift up Christ and let Him draw all men unto Himself. We don't have to have rock bands on the platform, women in the pulpits, people pleasers in the leadership roles, and the liberal interpretation of scripture, to grow. We need to be obedient to God's Word and preach and teach the truth. Young adults looking for a night club will get saved or leave. The Church's goal is not popularity it is Glorifying God and Reaching the Lost.

...
written by Genie, February 10, 2010

Carra is spot on! I believe Bobby missed her point. The younger generation isn't looking for "what's in it for me", but very interested in "how can I serve and make a difference?" It does matter that they see modeled diversity in the pulpit--gender, age, race, etc--showing that we practice what we preach. They have no patience with the holier-than-thou arrogance who preaches "down" to them a legalistic, angry and exclusive message. Jesus was criticized because he also had no patience with that and he lived and taught a message of love, inclusion and grace. Missional churches who are reaching out into their communities and the rest of the world with "hands-on" hard, messy work attract the young people of today. They are not content to send money to an unseen organization who will then decide how to use it. They don't trust many. You have to earn their trust and respect. They are not blindly loyal to an organization just because that's what their parents were loyal to. They are thinkers and doers and I praise God for them.

...
written by singer2, February 10, 2010

I have a recent example of how this can work: A young lady who has been a member of our church since childhood began to serve as a volunteer intern in our outreach program among inner city youth. She went away to college, majored in social work, and while there, formulated a detailed plan for a literacy project among children and youth in the MS Delta, complete with carefully structured budget. This plan, inspired by Christ's love for all, will happen this summer with the blessing and support of several churches and the state Cooperative Baptist Fellowship. In our church there is only liturgical worship---no rock bands and no consumer mentality. Our young people sit with their families in worship, rather than in special groups. They encounter lots of scripture in our services, planned prayers and responsive readings according to the season, and a warm and lively fellowship of support and grace....and challenging sermons from our pastor or from one of our associate pastors, both of whom are women. Our youth are heavily involved in our church and its outreach and worship. Our church is not perfect, but healthy and growing, and this project grows out of who we are in a community of Christ-like love and grace.

Generally on target
written by Slick, February 10, 2010

This article is pretty much on target from where I see things. The obsessive use of the term "Christ-followers" smacks of left-leaning ideology but other than that, she's got a good grip on things. There is nothing wrong with finding a church that "meets my needs" as long as those needs are centered around following the will of God and serving Him in that congragation. Young and old alike need to be part of things mor so than just showing up on Sunday morning, dropping $ in the plate and listenting to a harsh, overberaring preacher tell them what's wrong with them.

The fragmentation among churches, particularly those of the Baptist stripe, indeed makes it diifficult to find a place of worship/service whee one is comfortable. Style of worship is a significant factor tfor many today whereas 40 years ago, it's wasn't much of an issue.

I do believe that when an individual congregation makes too many departures from its core in a effort to attract more members while keeping others from leaving, it has made a mistake. The issue should not be which church any of us attend, it should be are we attending/participating/worshiping/serving as the Lord intends for us to do.

Baptist churches....
written by Big Daddy Weave, February 10, 2010

Shouldn't the title be "Why 20-and 30-year-olds are leaving Baptist churches" as there is no such thing as "the Baptist church."

Rick Wright, a Louisiana pastor of a CBF-affiliated congregation, has an interesting and lengthy response to Carra on his blog Live The Trinity

Here is the link
written by Big Daddy Weave, February 10, 2010

http://tiny.cc/carra

...
written by jbird, February 10, 2010

I have worked closely with young adults for more than thirty years--I have two young adult children. Ms. Greer's essay has some good insights, but may be a bit simplistic. The young adults I see every day (who "do" church) appear to be most excited about the "contemporary" feel of large congregations or by the very small groups of the "new monastics." They differ from my genration mostly by having little or no loyalty to the Baptist brand-name. Some young adults appear to be attracted to the "strong doctrine" approach. Fact is, their sociologies and psychologies are so diverse that they may appear unexpectedly anywhere they find lively, winsome, attractive ministerial leadership--and a critical mass of people like themselves. This is probably good news for the Kingdom, but bad news for every denomination, not just Baptist type-Christians.

By the way, I first heard the term "Christ-follower" from Esther Burroughs, one of the most effective proclaimers of the good news to young adults in the history of Southern Baptists! Left wing?? Balderdash! See Mark 2:17.

Red Letter Christ Followers
written by Mark Osgatharp, February 10, 2010

Carra said: "our churches must begin to reflect our changing communities. The ministerial staff must diversify to include people of all ages, races and genders as leaders."

Changing communities? People of all ages, races and genders? Does this mean that our communities used to didn't have people of all ages, races and genders but now they do?

LOL!

Anyone who wants to take a serious look at what what a "Christ-follower" church would be like, let them read the seven red letter letters to the seven churches of Asia.

Jesus Christ makes the Jerry Falwell of this world look like left wing liberals. If a real Christ-follower were to show up and speak out in the average Baptist church today - fundamentalist or modernist - he would be railroaded just like Jesus.

Mark Osgatharp
Wynne, Arkansas

A new book that addresses this topic
written by kshimer, February 10, 2010

nuChristian: Finding Faith in a New Generation by Russell Rathbun, an American Baptist ordained pastor, addresses this topic of how to reach young adults who are skeptical and mistrusting of the church. Check it out!http://www.judsonpress.com/product.cfm?product_id=13514

Where's Your Data?
written by MAR, February 11, 2010

As a "20/30" in ministry, I must disagree with my peer. I also must deflect to the writer at http://www.livethetrinity.net and say "if this is what it takes to attract young baptists then i quit."

My first address must be to the the ministers who are charged with encouraging the spiritual growth and empowering young people to understand the transformational relationship that occurs when we become Christ followers. This transformation happens OUTSIDE OF the youth group. And it is important for these teenagers (who in their 20s and 30s will be the "young Christ followers" Carra writes of) to understand that their identity in the local church is not wrapped up in youth group activities. They must be empowered to engage with people of all ages in the congregation (younger and older) so that in their later years they will not succumb to a "consumerist mentality" of the church meeting what they self-define as their needs.

My peers who are "young Christ followers" and I (like the rest of God's creation) are simply looking for a community...a community not defined by age. My favorite part of Wednesday night dinner at my apparently "watered down church" is sharing a meal with people who are at different stages in life and have been formed by different experiences. And as a woman in ministry, I could give a rip about the number women in ministry but I care about any minister (male or female) who experiences pain due to any form of abuse. I care about connecting with my neighbors whether they are old, white, gay, Latino, etc. As a "young Christ follower" all I care about is living a life of love as Christ did. I don't believe He took a census of how many "types" are represented first, and nor do I.

My peers in their 20's are looking for a church to be their family. Something like a replacement family they had as a child and youth - a church where people loved them even when they messed up a prayer, or made a dumb financial decision and still anonymously gave $50 just because they knew making rent was a stressful time. My friends in their 30s are looking for a church that will embrace them and their young growing family.

Please don't speak for all of us. We're not looking for a church that will take on a hot topic. We live life and try to understand Scripture and its meaning in the daily grind of our life. On the job when we work for a great boss, who happens to be gay, and in turn teaches us compassion because we realize homosexuals are not scary (contrary to what our "harsh" church taught us growing up.) And when we held hands with our college roommate as she agonized over and cried during her abortion, we were the hands of Christ. The church isn't a platform to tackle these "hot" topics (for one, who defines what's "hot" and what's not) rather, the church should affirm and be a community to help us receive or extend grace to others. This is not a "watered-down" church, this is a church built on love.

Really?
written by iChooseLove, February 11, 2010

Do we really pay your salary?
Love,
theninetyyearoldwomanwholivesinthemansionandisonthepers onnelcommitteeofyourbigchurch

p.s. I'm not really ninety, I'm actually part of the generation Rev. Greer is describing. But, this is what my grandmother's respons was when she read this article, and since I tend to agree with her, and she lacks basic computer skills, I decided to post this for her.

Love,

thetwentysomethingyearoldseminarianwhowouldratheryounot speakforher

Community
written by Bobby McCord, February 11, 2010

Where in the Bible is the emphasis put on community? The church was never intended to be a social club where everyone could be happy, prosperous, and entertained. God's plan is for His people to Worship Him and promote the Gospel of Christ no matter the cost, the suffering, the inconvenience, or the culture. Paul preached unity but only on the foundation of Christ and His Word. He said if anyone preaches any other gospel, which is really not a gospel, let him be accursed. We worry too much about programs, politics, and personalities, and not near enough about proclaiming the whole Truth of God's Word. A Circus draws a big crowd. A big crowd does not always mean a good church. A woman in the pulpit may bring in some different folks, a rock band on the platform may bring in a younger crowd, a people pleasing false gospel may fill a few pews, but it will no longer be a Bible believing Church. That is a price I am not willing to pay to increase the numbers.

...
written by NC Youth Minister, February 11, 2010

This sounds like the same kind of stuff I was listening to nearly a decade ago in a moderate, CBF-oriented Divinity School. No surprise there.

Here are some other ideas:

First, 20 - 30 somethings are on a continuum. They range from teenager to full-fledged adults with children. This is a very diverse group. They may be self-absorbed and idealistic or have already gotten married and had kids. Half of them are technically still adolescents--not even really adults in terms of their cognitive development... Isn't hard to generalize about a group spanning an entire decade, especially when you're talking about a group still undergoing the transition of child to adult?

Second, this group is as diverse as any in terms of ideology. But you could make some generalizations, I suppose.

All of these individuals have grown up in a culture that encourages self-centered and consumeristic behavior. Even the ones who have dreams of serving in Africa still want a new iPod from mommy and daddy for Christmas.

Most, if not all of these people, have received their education in an environment that is utterly results-driven and that simultaneously squelches the desire for authentic learning. Their first experience with an institution is negative. The same with church, which also demands moral or spiritual results but generally squelches the means by which to achieve these things: true and authentic community. And so they don't necessarily make a connection between an institution and achieving meaningful results. This, in particular, is a fallacy--the author of this article works in the service of an institution. As a result, dishonesty, piracy, cheating, etc... are minor transgressions at the most.

There has also been much too much of an emphasis toward their generation on self-esteem, and generally I think 20-30 somethings, in additional to being fairly self-absorbed, have generally over-inflated egos. I have witnessed this in working with Divinity school students, young church staff, and interns. Although they are well-meaning, they tend to have an unrealistic (inflated) view of what they bring to the table.

I would say that the trends you see among this demographic would depend on their embracing or reacting against the above ideologies in different ways. Also, on their background. Heck, could be anything, right?

I would just like to say that this makes them no different from the rest of us. There is no new formula for helping the next generation. My guess is that the communities that you would define as successful all utilize adequate leadership, are attaining extremely slow but measurable progress, emphasize being over doing (including the messages of grace and forgiveness), and have created a culture of belonging.

I think that might be all it really takes.

Twenty Somethings
written by carlosbr21, February 11, 2010

I read a good book on this topic last year. It was filled with lots of good surveys of young men and women from elementary school on past college. It found that while young men and women leave the church in their 20's and 30's, the doubts start way before that. The study found that children raised in sunday school were more likely to fall away and doubt later, many cited the bible seemed more like "fanciful stories" to anything that was practical to their lives. The reason why the Baptist church, or any church for that matter loses an age group, starts far earlier than in that actual age group. Just my two cents...

I don't really care if you don't like the AiG ministry but they have the money to do some good studies. The book is here

my blog and bible study

other differences
written by Xenophon, February 11, 2010

Besides differences among age groups already discussed, especially insightful were NC Youth Minister and jbird, I would include typical differences in the life cycle that evidence different fundamental motivations. Even though people continually cycle desire for excitement, tranquility, and transcendence, these motivations are more likely to be in the ascendancy among different temperaments and different age groups.

Young people (late teens through their twenties) tend to be drawn to very intense, challenging activities that can stretch them to the limit. These intense, demanding interests include sex, I might add. Those sorts of enterprises are healthy catalysts for young people's development if they channel their energy in the right way. Otherwise, those who are out to exploit the young's enthusiasm and idealism, paradoxically accompanied by a lack of understanding of human limitations and complexity of social patterns (which explains people of this age who are interested in politics' tendency to be attracted to the left--as Winston Churchill remarked, "Those who are not Communists at twenty, have no heart; those who are still Communist at thirty have no head") can serve as pied-pipers who lead the young to destruction--e.g., the mainstream music and movie industries.

In contrast, middle-aged people and children tend to need more tranquility than people in their late teens and their twenties. For example, men who have been married for a couple of years or more tend to experience a rather dramatic drop in testosterone accompanied by a rise in their estrogen, making them less creative and energetic that includes a drop in sexual interest. Such changes in middle-aged people's energy levels induces them to settle down and provide a stable environment to raise children in. And small children, though very energetic, need a lot of stability and predictability. That is why divorce is so catastrophic for them as well as is moving around the country as parents pursue rat-race goals of getting more and more "cheese" at the expense of having children and nurturing the ones that they have. Those middle-aged people who did not "get the memo" from nature and slow down either do not have families or neglect them.

So, when middle-aged families with children attend church, they are looking for a very different atmosphere, sermon and teaching subjects, activities and activity level than are young unattached people. They seek more comfort and a lack of a challenging edge. But typical church services and activities may seem dull to late teens and young adults. The subject matter of sermons may seem banal. Some young adults and teens are drawn to the fervency of the Evangelicals, but the tone and rhythm may still seem to drag. Charismatics have good energy and enthusiasm, but can lack substance. The rock concert quality of "contemporary" services can hold some, but might still lag compared with the real thing.

What is lacking in most Evangelical churches is a lack of in-depth discussions of theology and Apologetics. There is also a lack of a sense of place where a person of any age can feel the ties to our past that give the atmosphere in church a weighty, substantive feel. The new church buildings do not have any more character and ability to inspire than an office building. The move by more intelligent and emotionally sensitive young adults to the Roman Catholic Church and the Greek Orthodox Church reflect the lack attention Evangelicals have paid to the aesthetic and transcendent interests of some of the people who grew up in their churches.

Frankly, if not for my commitment to the theology of the Baptist tradition, I would be leaving for the high church. Going to church in an Evangelical church leaves me cold as far as the worship goes. I agree with Ms. Greer that the people can come across as harsh and abrasive even though many are kind and friendly. But even with some of the friendly folks, there seems to be an undercurrent of judgemental examination that I pick up. Of course, in temperament and personal style, I do not come across as one of them, and I am not.

...
written by ramni2, February 11, 2010

Superb commentary!!!

How Is This For "Red Letter" Harsh?
written by Mark Osgatharp, February 11, 2010

JESUS:

"I know thy works, and thy labour, and thy patience, and how thou canst not bear them which are evil: and thou hast tried them which say they are apostles, and are not, and hast found them liars."

"I know thy works, and tribulation, and poverty, (but thou art rich) and I know the blasphemy of them which say they are Jews, and are not, but are the synagogue of Satan."

"But I have a few things against thee, because thou hast there them that hold the doctrine of Balaam, who taught Balac to cast a stumblingblock before the children of Israel, to eat things sacrificed unto idols, and to commit fornication. So hast thou also them that hold the doctrine of the Nicolaitanes, which thing I hate. Repent; or else I will come unto thee quickly, and will fight against them with the sword of my mouth."

"Notwithstanding I have a few things against thee, because thou sufferest that woman Jezebel, which calleth herself a prophetess, to teach and to seduce my servants to commit fornication, and to eat things sacrificed unto idols. And I gave her space to repent of her fornication; and she repented not. Behold, I will cast her into a bed, and them that commit adultery with her into great tribulation, except they repent of their deeds. And I will kill her children with death; and all the churches shall know that I am he which searcheth the reins and hearts: and I will give unto every one of you according to your works."

"Behold, I will make them of the synagogue of Satan, which say they are Jews, and are not, but do lie; behold, I will make them to come and worship before thy feet, and to know that I have loved thee."

"I know thy works, that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot. So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth. Because thou sayest, I am rich, and increased with goods, and have need of nothing; and knowest not that thou art wretched, and miserable, and poor, and blind, and naked."

He that has an ear let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.

Mark Osgatharp
Wynne, Arkansas

From a 20 something who has left the church
written by TimD, February 22, 2010

I realize I'm a bit late to the party, but I wanted to thank you, Carra, for your comments. As a 20-something who has left the church (the sunday morning/in a building form of it), your analysis is quite accurate, in my opinion. I hope it's leading to some fruitful changes.

For those of you bent on ripping this article to shreds, have you considered that Carra wasn't attempting to articulate your viewpoint? Are you 20-40? Have you left the church? If not, you're probably not supposed to agree.

But hey, if you'd rather quit than try to connect with folks like me and my family, maybe we're not a good fit after all.

Readers alone are responsible for the content of the comments they post here. The comments are subject to the site’s terms and conditions of use and do not necessarily reflect the opinion or approval of the ABP News. Readers whose comments violate the terms of use may have their comments removed or all of their content blocked from viewing by other users without notification.

Write comment

You must be logged in to leave a comment. Login | Register

< Prev		Next >

Baptists

Nation

World

Opinion